Brackets Ep. 15: How (Dil)do You Do?

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Have you ever wondered which ancient philosopher was the sexiest, whether you should brag about that time you fell down, or how weird is too weird when passing down an heirloom? The panel of Bracketologists becomes divided as they take on these issues and put the practicality of puns on trial in episode 15 of Brackets!

‘An Old Wooden Dildo’ vs ‘Double-Bubba’

‘Fly Ball, Ladies’ vs. ‘ Toes That Are Too Long’

‘A Jellyfish With Bones’ vs. ‘Giraffes With Short Necks’

Featuring: Elizabeth Allen, Audie Deinlein, Kevin Tognetti, Jared Smith, and Zach Decker

Host/Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

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May 15, 2019

ProCo Episode 67: Oh, Geppetto! – Child Support

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Finally! All those hours Adam and Jared spent drinking beer and watching Spy Kids in college are finally paying off! Who would have thought that all of that knowledge of the Robert Rodriguez canon would be useful down the road now that The Contestants need to train a Spy Kid of their own. However, going unnoticed isn’t going to be easy when facing off against Spy Kids alum Ricky Gervais on Child Support.

Zach gets put on suck, Jared makes a lot of stew metaphors, and Adam finds a very good picture of a man holding antifreeze.

Talking Points Include: Cubs Sherpas, Crotchwurst, The Full House Fallacy, Training New Spy Kids, Strategy Stew, Puppet Castle, Geppett-no, Juni Cortez Sabara Trainor

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May 13, 2019

ProCo Episode 66: What Wayne Wants – Let’s Make A Deal

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Often, the most dangerous situations are disguised in a false sense of security, and the bizarro world to everyone’s favorite pricing game is no different. We have dealt with him before, but now Wayne Brady is on his home turf, and there’s no telling how much improvised singing will be needed to best him at his own game. The Contestants are finally stepping into the wacky, costumed, zonk filled world of Let’s Make A Deal.

Zach wants to make Wayne a deal he can’t refuse, Jared is convinced Wayne wants his voice, and Adam comes to the realization that Wayne wants for nothing.

Talking Points Include: Unachievable Dream Derby, Yu-Gi-Oh Horses, James Cameron’s Solo Podcast, Kangaroo Son, Hush Hush Wayne, Ariel Got Zonked, A Biddle of Fold, Grandpa Watch

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May 6, 2019

Brackets Ep. 14: Four Blue Lads From Liverpool

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Everyone knows the iconic foursome that changed music forever. You know, the British invasion guys. They were all bald and painted blue and they played the drums and caught marshmallows in their mouths. We’re thinking of the same group, right? Regardless, these blue guys are important, and their genetic makeup is discussed, along with socialist dogs, sexual communication, and fresh footwear in this episode of Brackets.

‘Bark for Socialism’ vs ‘Baby Body Builder’

‘Shark of the Covenant’ vs ‘Formal Crocs’

‘Home School Mascot’ vs ‘Air Horn’

Featuring: Kyle Tomlin, Nate Odenkirk, Kristi Durkin, Kerry Stevens, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

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May 1, 2019

ProCo Episode 65: Pounds for Pugsley – The Amazing Race (Part 2)

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It’s an episode so nice, we did it twice! Welcome back to our plan, where we’ve apparently decided that we didn’t give the rest of Fester’s family enough attention in the last episode. The Contestants expand on their already solid plan and figure out not only how to sneak a third twin in and out of the race, but also how to get both laces AND velcro onto the same shoe. We’ve spent double the time planning, so naturally we’ll have double the success on The Amazing Race.

Zach could talk forever, Jared has Pugsley on the mind, and Adam goes real tall and real fast.

Talking Points Include: A Recap, Drew Carey Watch, Pugsley Chat, Tattoos From Og, Shitty Riddles, Presetting Festers, Peeping Phil’s Itinerary, Aesthetic Laces, Spanish Town Conference, Toilet Cam, Uncle Flash Mob, Jerry’s Bee Transformation

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April 29, 2019

ProCo Episode 64: A Thoroughly Modern Fester – The Amazing Race (Part 1)

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Welcome all, to the first game show we’ve faced thus far that is SO BIG we’ve split our plan into TWO (2) episodes! So this one is all about getting on the show, and if we all have to shave our heads, wear trench coats, and hide from the sun for months to make it happen, then so be it. There’s gonna be some stiff competition as we jockey for a spot on The Amazing Race!

Zach is throwing a Jolly, Jared is hosting a Stinker, and Adam is having a Honker.

Talking Points Include: Midwestern Luau, One Honker of a Game Show, Kitchen Snake, A Spicy Relationship, Our Best and Our Worst, Becoming Three Twins, The Fester Situation, Arch Sweat Snapple, The Amazing Lace, Golden Hour Video

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April 22, 2019

Brackets Ep. 13: Beetle Juicery, Beetle Juicery, Beetle Juicery

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We think highly of our Bracketologists. We wouldn’t bring them into the studio to make these important decisions without the utmost confidence in their competency and intelligence. That being said, we can’t explain how these five people can’t piece together the plot of Beetlejuice! Regardless, grannies are idolized, syphilis is encouraged, and the role of pork is disputed in episode 13 of Brackets!

‘More Like The GRAPE Gatsby’ vs ‘Wham, Bam, Thank You Ham’

‘Syphil-YAS!’ vs ‘April Tools’

‘Alge-bruh’ vs ‘A Fuzzy Remote’

Featuring: Megan Gray, Liam Collier, Adam Levonian, Corinne Hastings, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

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April 17, 2019

ProCo Episode 63: Nine Angry Hamlets – Unan1mous

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When the Hell tormented ghost of a playwright with unfinished work hands you a copy of one of his very good plays, don’t ask questions, just do the play! And if you cooperate not only will you get the chance to perform it on Broadway, but you wont get dragged to Hell. How’s that for a good deal! The Contestants are going to have their cake and eat it too as they both produce the next big hit on stage AND win a cool million on Unan1mous.

Zach is the ghost, Jared literally wants to murder, and Adam thinks memories are weirder than potato soup.

Talking Points Include: Closing Time For The Big Dance, Tiny Dancer In The Wind, Potato Soup Pensieve, A Reluctance to Lie, Ghost Pilot, Million Dollar Performance, New Hamlets, A Makeshift Set, Touching The Ghost

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April 15, 2019

ProCo Episode 62: Locomotive and the Beef Quake – The Wall

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Look, we don’t want to frighten you, but just know that we are here to win, and if things don’t go our way all it takes is a couple of toots on this whistle and the place will be swarming with beefcakes in seconds. So why don’t you just ignore the fact that the big Plinko board is tilted and let us rack up a few million real quick. Nothing short of an actual earthquake is gonna keep us from robbing LeBron blind on The Wall.

Zach wants to cause an actual earthquake, Jared discovers a catch-all safety net, and Adam is overconfident about the Plinko odds.

Talking Points Include: Jared’s Apology, Chicago Elections, Carey v James, Monkey Ball, Detective Hardwick, Faking an Earthquake, Rock Nerds, Beef Payments

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April 8, 2019

Brackets Ep. 12: Thotronto

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Did you ever wonder what it would sound like when five people argue about how they picture an eating utensil in five vastly different ways? Well now your dreams can come true! When adding two brand new Bracketologists to the mix, gophers are adopted, sex positions are created, and beef is most certainly NOT reheated in this hot, no holds barred episode of Brackets.

‘April Juuls Day’ vs ‘Gopher Trophies’

‘Bro-ing Out of the Closet’ vs ‘Cold Beef’

‘I’ll Take “Popular Prisons” for 600’ vs ‘Toucan Samuel’

Featuring: Sam Otter, KJ Snyder, Sara Dirks, Stephen Mackey, and Zach Decker

Host/Editor: Adam Decker

Mixer: Jared Smith

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April 3, 2019