ProCo Episode 81: Twenty Years of Young Sheldon – Card Sharks

Apple Android Rss

Wow. It seemed like yesterday America’s favorite boy was learning about science and cracking catch phrases all over the place. But now, we at the Professional Contestants are proud to celebrate TWENTY YEARS of the Smart Lad. Time really does fly huh? He’s all grown up now. Like, really grown.

Hey, why is Young Sheldon 50 ft. tall?

Zach knows nothing about Ant-Man, Jared knows too much about Ant-Man, and Adam is throwing a party in Joel McHale’s pants.

Talking Points Include: Millionaire Birthday, Entirely Too Much Ant-Man Talk, There’s a Party in Joel’s Pants, Iron Maid-Ant, EGOT, Big Young Sheldon

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 81: Twenty Years of Young Sheldon – Card Sharks
August 19, 2019

Brackets Ep. 21: Spicy Moms Choose Jif

Apple Android Rss

We’ve got two, count em’, TWO brand new faces added to the Brackets roster on this episode. Join us in welcoming Reid and Lily as we force them to air out their thoughts on censorship of nudity in famous art, the upper limits of mango consumption, and the sort of dark secrets that could be found in a field of wheat.

‘The Emperor’s New Juul’ vs ‘Wheat Secrets’

‘Skirts for Rocks’ vs ‘ Al Dente Rice’

‘7 Consecutive Mangoes’ vs ‘Pie of the Storm’

Featuring: Reid Henry and Lily Lalios

Host: Zach Decker

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

Comments Off on Brackets Ep. 21: Spicy Moms Choose Jif
August 15, 2019

ProCo Episode 80: The Old Biff Paradox – Legends of the Hidden Temple

Apple Android Rss

So you can go ahead and congratulate us for winning Legends of the Hidden Temple. We’ve already done it. And though you may be wondering how we won a game show that only existed before two of us were born, the answer is actually quite simple: time travel. The Contestants are challenging the fabric of space and time itself in their great finale of this years Summer of Summers.

Zach yearns for a yacht podcast, Jared brags about his proper astronomy education, and Adam tries his best to explain time travel theories he doesn’t fully understand.

Talking Points Include: Summer’s End, Double-0-Yacht Talk, The Return of Jafar, Ninja Turtle Astronomy, WB Kids Cartoons, Time Travel Theories, The Comb of Albert Einstein, Empress Eugenie, DTTT, Fat Thor

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 80: The Old Biff Paradox – Legends of the Hidden Temple
August 12, 2019

ProCo Episode 79: Studies With Wolves – Fetch! with Ruff Ruffman

Apple Android Rss

Knock knock! Who’s there? Why Cesar Millan of course, here to work his magic and train a problem dog. Wait, what’s that? There’s no dog? Just three dudes who are trying to learn how to make a dog like them? You bet! The Contestants are trying to get inside the mind of a dog and become more appealing to the host of the PBS game show Fetch! with Ruff Ruffman.

Zach has experience in distributing fake points, Jared proposes a magical janitor swap, and Adam doesn’t think he can learn anything from Cesar Millan.

Talking Points Include: Yawn Deja Vu, Dog Jay Leno, Camp Points, Dumbledore Style, Lord Vulnerable, Becoming Good Boys, Mi Bisabuela, Human Whisperer, An Eleventh Hour Werewolf

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 79: Studies With Wolves – Fetch! with Ruff Ruffman
August 5, 2019

ProCo Episode 78: Mike Ditka Belongs in a Museum – Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego

Apple Android Rss

When hunting a geographically gifted criminal mastermind, it can be near impossible to track her down, let alone predict where she is going next. But if we could lure her to us with Mike Ditka and a bottle of malort, now we’re getting somewhere. The Contestants are after the world’s most mobile thief who puts the Miss in misdemeanor as they take on Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego.

Zach thinks Carmen Sandiego is a bird, Jared thinks Carmen Sandiego will want to steal the first hat, and Adam thinks Carmen Sandiego has the power of teleportation.

Talking Points Include: Birthday Week, Ruff Housing, Rockapella, World’s Best Henchmen, Wildest Thefts, Return to Shoe, The Most Chicago Things, Batman Galas, Malort Tracking Device

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 78: Mike Ditka Belongs in a Museum – Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego
July 29, 2019

Brackets Ep. 20: Always a Taft, Never a Lincoln

Apple Android Rss

As we continue forward with our new Brackets format, we welcome a newcomer to the fray! The self proclaimed Awkward Uncle of our podcasting family, Heston Charres, joins the debate as we discuss the limits of party snacks, personifying bathroom appliances, and real life consequences for board games.

‘Pop-Whiz’ vs ‘Mashed Potato Volcano’

‘The Barter System’ vs ‘Scream Cheese’

‘Shaking Your Booty’ vs ‘Criss-Cross Applesauce’

Featuring: Heston Charres

Host/Mixer: Jared Smith

Editor: Adam Decker

Comments Off on Brackets Ep. 20: Always a Taft, Never a Lincoln
July 24, 2019

ProCo Episode 77: Aggro Shaq – Nickelodeon Guts

Apple Android Rss

The days are long, the weather is hot, and the sun is high in the sky. As we breathe in that hot, humid air, there’s only one that is on our mind. It’s back! The Summer of Summers has returned to the Professional Contestants once again. In the search for this summer’s honoree, we first find ourselves facing an iconic monolith in children’s competition shows. No, not the Aggro Crag, I’m referring to Shaquille O’Neal. Come along as we fix all the problems with Nickelodeon Guts.

Zach fears Reggie Miller’s disappointment, Jared fears Lightning McQueen, and Adam fears his butt being shown on a jumbotron.

Talking Points Include: Return of The Summer of Summers, Mark It Days, Host Appreciation, Ultimate Sports Fantasies, Pantsing Tom Brady, Sports Nightmares, Employing a Boggart, Stealing From Shaq

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 77: Aggro Shaq – Nickelodeon Guts
July 22, 2019

ProCo Episode 76: Eat Pray Putt – Holey Moley

Apple Android Rss

Many times in life you will find yourself in situations that seem overly unnecessary and stressful. You could either complain about it, or you could experience it to it’s full potential and then use that experience later in life when Kenny G plays saxophone in your face while you’re trying to golf. That’s right, The Contestants are going on a journey of self discovery to prepare themselves for what’s to come on Holey Moley.

Zach defends the purpose of sports, Jared really dislikes golf, and Adam is hesitant to be naked on national TV.

Talking Points Include: Freud Themed Party, Penis Limit, Hot Takes On Golf, The Purpose Of Sports, Git Gud, B.S. Biathlon, Becoming Zen, Darn Near Naked, Real World B.S. Experience

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 76: Eat Pray Putt – Holey Moley
July 15, 2019

Brackets Ep. 19: Whiskey For My Men, Beer For Your Dad – Professional Contestants Crossover

Apple Android Rss

Maybe you’ve heard of Professional Contestants before? Ya know, it’s the other podcast we produce. Well if you never got around to listening to it then open up those ears because your favorite Bracketologists are bringing it right to you! Welcome to the crossover of our two shows, serving up the quality ranting of ProCo in the semi-organized format of Brackets.

‘Avocado Ghost’ vs ‘An Oxford Holla’

‘Pringle Bells’ vs ‘Passive Aggressive Plant Names’

‘A Really Successful Bake Sale’ vs ‘OLD Brew’

Featuring: Zach Decker, Jared Smith, and Adam Decker

Editor: Adam Decker

Comments Off on Brackets Ep. 19: Whiskey For My Men, Beer For Your Dad – Professional Contestants Crossover
July 9, 2019

ProCo Episode 75: Whiskey For My Men, Beer For Your Dad – Brackets Crossover

Apple Android Rss

You’ve probably heard of Brackets before, mostly because we tell you about it almost every episode. Well if you never got around to listening to it then open up those ears because your favorite Contestants are bringing it right to you! Welcome to the crossover of our two shows, serving up the quality ranting of ProCo in the semi-organized format of Brackets.

Zach affirms the dangers of pots and pans, Jared is frightened by sea urchins, and Adam supports Willie Nelson’s father in liquid form.

Talking Points Include: Hostess Animals, Hollas For Everyone, Receipt Personal Ads, Orphan Games, Citing Your Handshakes, Alexander Graham Bell’s Shawtys, The Rise of King Dedede, Poison Edith, Dad In Every Sip

Comments Off on ProCo Episode 75: Whiskey For My Men, Beer For Your Dad – Brackets Crossover
July 9, 2019