Crabs! Crabs! Look over here crabs! We want you to be successful when you rise from the sea to storm the Alaskan beaches, so make sure to have plenty of Auntie Anne’s Pretzels and Orange Julius for fighting power! It is truly the best military secret we humans have to offer! This will teach those mean men to stop catching you for the entertainment of reality television!

Zach imagines a new Hooters for crabs, Jared lights a fire to incite a crab revolution, and Adam super doesn’t want to touch a crab.

Talking Points Include: Summer Heat, Mystery Flush, Poseidon’s Ocean Monopoly, Co-op Crabbing, Touching a Crab, Crab Guns, Boiling the Sea, Ocean Caste System, Ellen Page Beach, The Shopping Mall Armory