ProCo Episode 106: Polly Wants a Smacker – The Glee Project

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Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness whispered into their ear while they are taking a nap. That third one is obviously the only way we are going to get Glee creator Ryan Murphy to make a new season of his great high school show, but this time staring an old janitor and his parrot. This pure TV gold is coming at you straight from The Glee Project.

Zach has opinions about Ryan Murphy, Jared wants to get Johnathan Banks in Glee, and Adam is a proponent of parrot representation on TV.

Talking Points Include: Return of Ruff Housing, Big Dog x Wrestling, Show About a Room, High School Parrot, Forbidden Love, Breaking A Witch’s Curse, Our Glee Spec Script, Multiple Spin-offs, Incepting Another Murphy

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April 13, 2020

ProCo Episode 105: Jumanjy! Jumanji! Jumanjé! – League of Legends World Championship

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Ok, here’s the plan. Like all good heists, the target will be distracted while our elite team of five sneaks in and retrieves the reward. The distraction: Jumanji. The team: ProCo + Banderas and Shalhoub. The objective: The Win. Who says we have to heist something physical? We’re taking on esports for the first time as we target The League of Legends World Championship.

Zach is Clean Tom, Jared is Mr. Potato Head, and Adam is Romance Mac.

Talking Points Include: Gentlemen’s Hour, Esports Resort, Champion Trivia, Gragas Fan Club, Pleasure Personified, The Two Time Tonys, Team Cosplay, A Double Heist, Entering the Game

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April 6, 2020

ProCo Episode 104: Invasion of the Bionicle Snatchers – LEGO Masters

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Y’all remember Bionicles? Remember how super cool they were and how you definitely wanted to be intimate with them? Just make sure to keep that in mind when the inevitable Bionicle invasion happens. It will help the whole situation go down much smoother. It’s all for a good cause anyway because that invasion is going to be our key to outbuilding the competition in LEGO Masters.

Zach dreams of a chimney on a cat, Jared dreams of a Dilbert remake with Shaq, and Adam dreams of a ghost made of pudding.

Talking Points Include: Ladies Love NCIS Los Angeles, Tupac and a Half Man, Pokemon not Pokemons, Ignoring Lego Guides, Naked Brick Suit, Shaq Social Commentary, The Bride of Dr. Bionicle’s Monster, Will Arnett but Better, Bionicle: Home Wrecker, A New Better Nutcracker

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March 30, 2020

ProCo Episode 103: Who’s Afraid of This Armored Horse? – Knight Fight

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Fact No. 1: Anyone is more intimidating when they are on a horse. Fact No. 2: Horses are super powerful and can definitely beat you up. Fact No. 3: A horse can take on five armored knights simultaneously if the horse also has armor and knows karate. Need I say more? We are riding this horse straight to the Armored Combat League and becoming the champions of Knight Fight.

Zach thinks the horse should be part of our armor, Jared thinks the horse should know karate, and Adam thinks the horse should be fake.

Talking Points Include: Gatorade Hot Tub, Taking It Easy, Disappointing Fights, Eight Way Joust, Cootie Knights, Chitty Chitty Neigh Neigh, Nerd on a Horse, Big Jake and Thumbelina, The Air Bud Defense

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March 23, 2020

ProCo Episode 102: HBO Presents: Horton Hears Doritos! A Bud Light Experience – The Drinking Game Show

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Gather round kids, and I’ll tell you the story of how an elephant saved an entire civilization that existed on a delicious nacho cheese snack chip. The world consisted entirely of branded products and cost over five hundred million dollars to broadcast live to the viewers of a certain annual big game. Oh yeah, and the dude who directed Thor was involved. Stop asking about The Drinking Game Show. We’re doing Seussical now.

Zach rewrites musical lyrics, Jared fully understands knighthood, and Adam has an award nominated voice.

Talking Points Include: Snakes vs Mice, Back to Stinkers, Our Doritos Commercials, Rewriting Seussical, Hijacking a School Project, Befriending The Director of Thor, A Dr. Seuss Cameo, Improvised Uncle Chipps, A Live Commercial Musical

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March 16, 2020

ProCo Episode 101: Oh No, He’s Hot! – The Circle

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THE CONTESTANTS ARE BACK FOR SEASON TWO BABY! As we return from our brief hiatus, we have the urge to change things up a bit, and the energy we’re bringing is gonna be wild. To kick off this new phase of the ProCo saga, we are jumping head first into future of reality game shows. Welcome to The Circle, where despite the fact that players only interact via social media, we can still find a way fake a murder!

Zach wants to be a joke-a-day account, Jared wants to be a cuss boy, and Adam wants to catfish people with memes.

Talking Points Include: Zach’s Life Trivia, Season Two Energy, Horny Jail, Developing Our Persona, Jared’s Philosophical Questions, A Sexy Reveal, Faking a Murder, Hot Detectives

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March 9, 2020

ProCo Episode 100: The Perfect Game Show

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100 episodes. 97 plans created. It’d be a shame to let all this game show knowledge go to waste.

Finally, on our 100th episode of Professional Contestants, the leading experts on Game Show Studies will create the world’s most perfect game show.

Buckle up.

Zach makes a PowerPoint, Jared pats himself on the back, and Adam really wants a heist.

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January 13, 2020

ProCo Episode 99.5: The History of Donkey Kong – Bonus Episode

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Here you go folks, it’s the in depth analysis on Donkey Kong’s extended history that you didn’t ask for, but certainly need to hear. Join Zach and Jared as they are taken through the DK Crew’s troubling timeline by newly anointed Kong historian, Adam Decker. War, family conflict, the occupation of foreign territory to bleed it dry of its main resources, it’s all here.

Access the companion guide here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1kZKx7oEe9wQFCpe_YC4KNmVx3jM70Ru0/view?usp=sharing

You’ll need it.

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January 6, 2020

ProCo Episode 99: Tin Man’s Christmas Salad – Holiday Gingerbread Showdown

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Happy holidays to all! We actually managed to get a properly themed episode this week, where we’re facing off in an artistic baking competition against professional gingerbread artists. We know we don’t stand a chance… unless we could somehow enlist the help of Santa’s Arch Elf. Wait, wasn’t he in Numb3rs too? With those powers combined, we can bake up an unstoppable structure to win Holiday Gingerbread Showdown.

Zach describes a magic trick, Jared dreams up a cookie building infrastructure, and Adam thinks he looks like the guy from Numb3rs.

Talking Points Include: Countdown to Quichemas, Credit Card Butt, Gingerbread Experience, Questionably Edible, Gremlins’ Day Off, Random Word Christmas, Finding an Assistant, Kid Numb3rs, Baking Oceans 11, Lego Cookies, Theme Lightning Round, Christmas Salad

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December 23, 2019

ProCo Episode 98: Christmas Staycation – Holiday Showdown

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When planning the opposite of a well balanced and truly exciting vacation, it isn’t a bad vacation we want, but rather one that is 100% neutral. And when a lecture on the density of rocks given by Danny DeVito is still too exciting, we’re going to have to think even more bland if we want to earn the most thrilling vacation on Holiday Showdown.

Zach defends the dignity of Indianapolis, Jared reveals his Christmas itinerary, and Adam has a hard time grasping true neutral.

Talking Points Include: We Got Got, Artificial Conflict, Vacationing at Jared’s House, Old Leonard, Our Ideal Vacations, Everything Bagel Opposite, Best Worst Neutral, Idle Gorge, Pioneer Village, World’s Largest Bob Evans, A Thrilling Packing List

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December 16, 2019